Maybe it's that I'm coming off a nasty feverish virus that has made sleeping hard, or that I haven't been to the gym all week, or just that a lot has been anxiously bubbling beneath the surface... But some days, you wake up feeling like an absolute mess who can't handle ANYTHING. Ta da! ...… Continue reading Being the Me I Need Today
Tag: grief
Checking in!
I know my blog has been quiet, but I'm still alive and kicking! It's actually mostly a good thing, as I've felt well enough to have a full and great summer with my kids. I'm down to one, much milder version of chemotherapy, and almost all of my symptoms (minus a few lingering and/or mystery… Continue reading Checking in!
Let’s Talk About Death, Baby… wait, should we? Shhh!
I just came in from mowing my lawn, and pulling up a mess of matted, withered, crunchy and dry flower stalks in the beds. It's almost fall, and though it hasn't turned cold and STAYED cold yet, everything is in the process of turning crunchy and withered. I could have let those splayed out viny… Continue reading Let’s Talk About Death, Baby… wait, should we? Shhh!
Through unlined eyes…
Some time over the course of this summer, my daily guilty pleasure eye-liner habit slipped into an every other day thing. And then a few-times-a-week thing. Until summer break drew to a close, and over a week went by with nary an eyeliner application.Was it having the kids home, and less time for myself? Nah.… Continue reading Through unlined eyes…
We should be uncomfortable with this
I am feeling my blog title acutely, in the wake of ANOTHER mass school shooting. Alive: Well, in a country with a gun obsession that claims to be more about "my rights!" than worshiping guns, I made it another day in the USA without being gunned down in a supermarket, church, school, public park, or… Continue reading We should be uncomfortable with this
And So It Flows…
Hmm. The Universe apparently knew something when it dropped the notion of "flow" into my life for 2022. Here we are, 11 days in to the new year, and instead of boarding a plane to go to Florida tonight, we're a household in quarantine after one of the kids became symptomatic and tested positive for… Continue reading And So It Flows…
It’s the most (fill in the blank) time of the year
There's no doubt that the close of the year can be wonderful and festive, but for so many people - and for so many reasons - it can also be stressful, lonely, conflicting, and a huge exercise in coping with expectations versus reality. I just made a list with 80+ names of people of whom… Continue reading It’s the most (fill in the blank) time of the year
Fears of
Betraying my principles. Betraying myself. Going backwards. Trying and failing. Forgetting who I am. Other people's standards. My standards. Conditional love. Buying into lies. Being stuck. Voicing this. Not voicing this. Being uncomfortable. Staying uncomfortable. Ya feel me?
Coming (no-longer) home
Living close to the 45th parallel, there's a scent sometimes - often on cool mornings after rainy nights - that appears and transports me to a sacred place. (Also close to the 45th parallel.) It happened the other morning, as I walked out to get the mail. Earthy. Fresh. Crisp. Full of possibility. Uncanny. That… Continue reading Coming (no-longer) home
Until then.
(A poetic offering.) When all of this is doneWill we recognize each other again? When all the masks are put awayWill you know me with hair turning gray? Will you know me withless weight, or more?Will you still avoidthe grocery stores?Will you stay distantbecause of habits you've learned?Will you be contentto not publicly return -To… Continue reading Until then.
alive. awake. uncomfortable. 